Worshipping Through Grief

photo from boundless.org

Hello,

It has been way too long since I have posted. I am going to do better. Life always seems to get in the way. I am going to share something that is painful. I didn’t want to share it, but I have felt so compelled to share it. I wrote a draft post and refused to look at it again or finish it until now.

A lot has happened since I last posted in February. In August I had surgery to remove endometriosis. I have had pain and problems for years. One of those was infertility. We have been trying to have a baby since 2014. I had a miscarriage in 2015. We were unable to get pregnant after that. We were hopeful that this surgery would allow us to have a baby. It seems the surgery was successful, I’ve not had pain. In October, I found out I was pregnant.

We were so excited! Finally! My husband and I talked about names, we talked about how we were going to move things around to make a nursery, and we talked about how we hoped we would be good parents.

I never thought that another miscarriage was possible. I truly felt this time that we would get to hold our sweet baby! It was due in June of 2019. We even told our family over a special dinner.

I had to have blood tests right away since I have had a miscarriage before. I started to worry. The tests came back with levels too low. Then I had complications and that ended with me having a miscarriage. Even as I type this, the word makes me cringe. My greatest fear came true.

When I first found out that this pregnancy was not going well, I was devastated. Then I was angry and hurt. I remember driving home from work so mad at God, I cried red hot tears. I didn’t understand how He could let this happen. The one thing we have prayed for, for years, finally happened and now it was being ripped away.

After crying out in anger, I felt guilty for getting angry. Then I felt sad. This pregnancy was different than the first one. We had an early ultrasound. I got to see it. My husband and I felt so happy after the ultrasound. Less than a week later the baby was gone.

I was so sure that this time it would be okay. Finding out that the baby was gone, felt like being crushed by boulders. When my Mom dropped us off back home from the hospital, I completely broke. I was and still am heartbroken. I still don’t understand or know why. I just have to trust that this was for the best.

My Dad came and picked me up the next morning and took me to get some coffee and so I could get my car from my parents’ house. He mentioned David and what he did after the death of his child. Once I got home, I read 2 Samuel 12. David’s child with Bathsheba fell ill and died. When he heard that the child died, he got up, washed and anointed himself and went to the house of the Lord and worshiped. His servants were confused with David’s actions. They didn’t understand why when the child was sick David didn’t eat and mourned but when it died, he got up from his grieving bed. I love how David answered them.

2 Samuel 12:22-23 “And he said, while the child was yet alive, I fasted and wept: for I said, who can tell whether God will be gracious to me that the child may live? But now he is dead, wherefore should I fast? can I bring him back? I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me.”

David did not stay in his grief. He knew that he would see his child again one day. He worshiped God. I have discovered that worship brings comfort. I took time to grieve. The day after I lost the baby, I went to church and was anointed. I wanted to be like David. I asked God at the beginning of this that He would get the glory.

Worship has been the key for me. Knowing God is good even when He doesn’t answer prayers the way we want has been a comfort as well. God is good, even though the things He allows bring me pain. Though he slay me, yet I will trust him. Job 13:15 I don’t understand why, but I chose to trust the Lord. I hope that I can help someone else.

I lost the baby October 27. It has been over a month now. I have my good days and bad days. Thanksgiving was hard and this month has been a little hard as well. We would have gotten to hear a heartbeat this month. Instead of hearing our sweet baby’s heartbeat, I have a broken heart. It is hard to not blame myself. There is a guilt that comes with a miscarriage. You think that there is something wrong with you. You think that if you would done this or not done that it wouldn’t have happened. Sweet friend, these are lies from the enemy to oppress you and destroy you. He wants nothing more than to use your grief as chains to keep you down. Satan wants to make you feel like this is your fault. This is not your fault. That is a lie straight from the pits of hell. These things happen because they just do. It isn’t comforting, but it is the truth. These things happen and we don’t understand why we may not until we get to Heaven.

Friend, if you are going through this or have gone through this, know this is NOT your fault. You are loved. You are not alone. When Satan tries to destroy you with lies about who you are, remember whose blood covers you and all sins. There is nothing that you can go through that will make God love you less. He loved you enough to give his only begotten son that we can have eternal life. Jesus overcame the world and He will help you overcome grief. Not every day will be perfect. You will have moments, sometimes out of nowhere that will bring you to your knees. Keep strong, keep holding on and keep trusting God.

Worship the Lord. Do not think that because you are broken you cannot worship. That is a lie from the enemy. Worship brings healing! I listed some of the songs that I have been worshiping to well sometimes ugly crying and worshiping.

Worship Playlist:

Trust in you- Lauren Daigle

Thy Will – Hillary Scott & Thr Scott Family

What a Beautiful Name – (Hillsong) Kari Jobe

You Say – Lauren Daigle

I Am Not Alone – Kari Jobe

Who You Say I am – Hillsong Worship

The Hurt & The Healer – Mercy Me

So Will I – (Hillsong Worship) Tori Kelly

Reckless Love – performed by Steffany Gretzinger

God’s Will?

I recently read a verse in my bible that reached out of the page and slapped me. It cut me. It made me angry because I knew it was true.

The verse was 1 Thessalonians 5:18 “In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.”

I read that and thought oh yah?!? Really?!?! I should be thankful for all the crap we have been going through recently?! This is stupid! I am not thankful for this pain, the burdens, the worrying or anything else! I was angry. I was not happy. I was full of rage. My husband was upset and feeling down and when he hurts I feel the pain. I hate to seem him upset. It kills me. I just wanted to hold him and take all the pain away and make it better but I couldn’t.

I couldn’t understand why God would allow us to have our “bottom” fall out. One thing after another kept happening. I got pregnant then lost the baby. Kyle left his job of 2 years for another job that was supposed to give great benefits and supposed to be great, and it wasn’t. My car decided that it no longer wanted to be alive and started falling apart and we didn’t have the money to fix it. My husband was struggling with not feeling like he was a provider and feeling upset about his job situation. The devil had launched a full blown attack on our home and I was angry at God for it. Even writing this makes me feel embarrassed that I was mad at the wrong person. It’s like DUH IVA!! Hello McFly!!

That is what Satan does. He uses smoke and mirrors to distract us. He is really good at his job. We have to be ready for him. We’re constantly in war. He will do whatever he can to destroy us from doing what we are called to do for God. He doesn’t want us to succeed. He wants to use our failures, past sins, downfalls and mistakes as ways to keep us from moving forward. He will bring up the past and make you feel like God can’t forgive you of your sins. John 10:10 “The thief (Satan) cometh not, but to steal, and to kill and to destroy…”

The bible clearly states that Satan has come to steal. He will steal things like your joy, your peace of mind, your happiness, your health, your finances and whatever else he can get his grimy nasty claws on. He will kill your ministry, your relationships, and try to take your life.He ultimately wants to destroy you.

The second part of John 10:10 says …I (Christ) have come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.

Jesus died for us so that we could live. He was tortured and beaten for you and me. He performed miracles, including calming the raging sea.

I’ve seen little pictures and blurbs around the internet that say Jesus either calms the storm or he calms his child. I think that sometimes he does both.

I’ve always loved the stories in the bible where Jesus calmed the storms. They are some of my favorite ones. Matthew 8:23-27 talks about such an instance. Verse 24 says “And, behold, there arose a great tempest in the sea, insomuch that the ship was covered with the waves: but he was asleep.”

I love that last part, but he was asleep. The storms were raging, the boat was filling with water, fears were high, there was chaos all around and Jesus was asleep. The next verse talks about how the disciples awoke him and said Jesus save us!!! He immediately said (vs 26)”…Why are ye fearful, O ye of little faith? Then he arose, and rebuked the winds and the sea; and there was a great calm.”

Sometimes it seems like God doesn’t see what we are going through. It feels like he doesn’t care and that he is a million miles away. That isn’t true. He does care and he will help you through these storms and give you the strength you need to get through. Sometimes he is quiet. I’ve always heard that a teacher is quiet during a test.

When I was about 5 years old, I was outside swinging on my swing set like most 5 year old girls like to do. I probably had a stuffed animal and had been picking dandelions. A drunk man came from the back of our property and came up close to the house where I was swinging. He didn’t say anything. He just looked at me and my danger alarms started going off. I started screaming to the top of my lungs for my Daddy. My mom came out and the guy kept walking and walked down the road. My Dad wasn’t there, he was at church that evening. Even though my Daddy wasn’t there, I wanted him because I knew he would keep me safe. He went through the park minutes later when he got back home and kicked ever beer can he could find looking for that man.

When I was about 6 we went Easter egg hunting in the park. My Daddy took me and they lined all of the kids up on the spray painted line. They blew the whistle signaling the start of the hunt. All the kids took off. I did too because I was so excited to get some candy and stickers. That didn’t happen though. Most of the kids started pushing and shoving other kids. Every egg I reached for someone took. Someone even took an egg right out of my hand. My Daddy came over to me and grabbed my hand and walked me back to the truck and we went home. He had enough of that and he could see me getting upset.

God is that way too. He sees what we’ve gone through. Just because he doesn’t come when you first call for him to save you doesn’t mean that he doesn’t hear you or that he doesn’t care. Daddys are good for holding our hands and holding us making us feel safe. Even to this day I still feel that love and that his arms are a safe place to be when he hold me.

God answered mine and Kyle’s prayers and our bottom isn’t falling out anymore. All the hardships and all the tears shed and the worry and fear and anger is mostly gone. We always worry a little too much about some things, but for the most part God has given us that peace that passeth all understanding. There isn’t understanding sometimes.

My husband Kyle got an opportunity to work for a Christian man. This man and his wife are wonderful people. He gets to work with two other guys who are also Christians. They pray before going to work and get devotions to read. God laid this job in our laps. I love divine plans. His timing is truly perfect. I also got a new car thanks to my parents. They are amazing and bless me. God has blessed us so much! The other prayer that we have been praying about, a baby, hasn’t happened yet but if it is God’s will it will. It will be perfect as well.

May God bless you all!

Iva Mae

 

 

 

 

Waiting in the Hallway

Waiting is hard. Especially if you have been waiting for something for a long time.

I told my Mom today I don’t know why I get my hopes up for something when it is never going to happen. She said something that struck me.

She said “It’s hard to be in the hallway waiting for a window or a door to open…BUT Praise him for what you have now.”

It really is hard to wait in the hallway and see doors that look like they will open but don’t. For a moment you’re thrilled and excited and you think this is it!!!

…But it isn’t. The door doesn’t open.

This has happened to me several times in the past few years. I have been praying for God to move and it just hasn’t happened yet. I’m getting worn and impatient. It is hard to wait when you want something so badly. I’ve been angry and sad. I can’t understand why that when God knows I am unhappy and miserable that he hasn’t moved yet. I don’t think I’m supposed to understand. I’m simply just supposed to wait.

Sometimes we go through things and we don’t understand them. It is just God protecting us from something that is not His will. I’ve always prayed that His will, not mine be done. His will is best for me and I know that, sometimes I just get tired and grouchy. I become a bratty child.

I don’t know how God puts up with me sometimes! Sometimes I can’t stand to be around myself!!! Seriously!

I woke up this morning with Psalms 62 on my mind. Psalms 62:5 “My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him.”

How do I know that what I’ve been wanting might be the worst possible thing for me or what problems in my life it could cause. Writing this reminds me of when my husband was looking for a job a few years back. He found a position that required him to attend training sessions for the job. After the second day he told me he was never going back because they wanted him to lie to the elderly and be dishonest about problems so that the company could get more money. I was so proud of him for doing that.

I was reminded of this so that I could see that what I wanted may end up being like that. Not what you want at all and completely wrong and unethical. My husband refused to take a position that would require him to be dishonest and misleading. That was the right choice! It didn’t matter how much money they said he would make he chose to do what was right by him and by God.

Today I choose to be thankful for a prayer that hasn’t been answered. I know in God’s timing everything will work itself out and God will open up a door that no one else can. Like my Mom said, I will be thankful for what I have now. I am blessed!

On another note, I was anointed at church on Sunday for some of the health issues I’ve been dealing with and today is the first day in a long time that my stomach hasn’t hurt or bothered me. I am especially thankful for that!!! I’ve been sticking with a no dairy no meat diet for over a week. I’m prod of myself. Last night I even made some Vegan Mac n’ Cheese. It was pretty good last night but it was better today!

I encourage you to wait on God for whatever it is you’re praying for. Don’t be discouraged when he doesn’t answer right away or doesn’t give you the answer you want. Remember that God answers things in His timing. PERFECT timing and it will be better than what you imagined.

Love from above,

Iva Mae

Broken </3

We hear the word broken and typically the first thing that comes to mind is – “How are we gonna fix it?” or “How are we going to replace it?”

We have broken cars, washers, refrigerators, lawn mowers, plumbing, bones, lives, families, hearts, dreams  and homes.

What is the actual definition of broken? Is it something so far gone that it cannot be fixed? It is something meant to be left broken or is it meant to be fixed?

According to Oxford Dictionary Broken is:

1. having been fractured or damaged and no longer in one piece or in working order:

synonyms: smashed · shattered · fragmented · splintered · crushed

1. (a person) having given up all hope; despairing:synonyms: defeated · beaten · subdued · demoralized · dispirited

So broken is something damaged. It can be something that isn’t whole (one piece), It can be shattered, crushed, smashed or splintered. It can be something that no longer works. It can even be someone who has given up.

Recently my husband and I both have broken bones. I broke my toe and he broke his finger. I was angry when I broke my toe. I was so angry. It was an accident. Accidents happen but I didn’t want something like that to happen to me. I have too many things to do and I couldn’t walk as fast and could barely walk at all. I thought how could something so small cause me so many problems? My husband went roughly through the same thing. He couldn’t put his boots on or take them off. He found himself frustrated that he wasn’t physically able to do something. Both of us have had a lot of physical pain associated with these breaks.

I found myself really behind on my housework, laundry, dishes and everything else. My house was a mess and still kind of is. All of that got me thinking about how our bodies work. My toe is a small member of my body but when it is broken, my entire body and life suffers. The same goes with the body of Christ. When a member is broken, no matter how small, it is noticeable and until there is healing the whole body will suffer.

When a person is broken that doesn’t mean we need to fix them or that they are no longer worth saving. Jesus came to save the world and provide healing to those who are broken. God tells us so in His word. Isiah 53:5 “He was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed.”

When we are broken we need rest. We need God to pick up the pieces and make them whole again. Our church had a revival a few weeks ago. I was only able to make it to one night. The night I went, the preacher preached about being broken by things we allow into our lives and by circumstances. He had a flower pot and spun it around in his hands and threw it up and caught it. He said we allow more and more things into lives and we let our vessel get loose. The next thing you know your vessel ends up so loose that it falls from your hands and breaks. He threw the pot behind him and it broke into many pieces. He said you can try and try to pick up the pieces but you can’t. He also said you can’t be used when you are a broken vessel. God won’t use a broken vessel. (One reason when members of the body of Christ are broken the whole body suffers)

The only way to get whole again is to get down on your knees and ask God to heal you and forgive you and to help you. He got down on his knees as he said this. He said God will pick up your pieces and he will put you back together again. He held up a new pot for us all to see what God can do with our lives and vessels.

At the time I was struggling with many things and I felt so convicted over his message. I had been broken for a long time and had not gone to God for my healing. The preacher went on to say that we could have broken marriages, lives, vessels, witnesses, homes whatever and that God would heal it. I felt so overwhelmed with the Holy Spirit telling me to go to the alter and ask for forgiveness and healing. I am glad that I did because I walked away feeling whole again. I walked away with hope and with a renewed heart and soul.

Sometimes we have to be broken to be made whole. God can make you whole. He can restore you and revive you. He will pick up your pieces and put you back together. It may be painful. The healing may be a process like the healing of a broken bone, but don’t give up!!! Keep praying, keep reading, keep trusting and keep the faith!

Whatever is broken in your life whether it be; your marriage, your heart, your life, your mind, your spirit, your witness, your finances, your body – come to Jesus and ask for a healing. If you’ve let sin slip into your life, come to Jesus. He will give you healing and forgiveness.

I always feel awkward writing a prayer but I need to do what is on my heart.

God,

I ask that you speak to the hearts of those who read this. I ask that you would provide healing in whatever aspect of life that it is needed. I ask you to give them a renewal of their hearts, souls and minds. I thank you for what you’ve done and what you will do. I ask that you flood each person’s life who reads this with your love. God we know you are exceeding and able to do all things and we know that you will. I ask that if someone is reading this and they used to be on fire for you that you would stir up their hearts and start a fire in them again. I ask you to give peace and comfort and joy to those who are without it. Lord we ask that if there is someone reading this who doesn’t know you, that they will come to know you. Use us Lord and let us be your vessels. I ask all these things in your name, Amen.

My hope for you is that you will come to the well that never goes dry and that you will get what you need.

Love from above,

Iva Mae

It Is Well

So let go my soul and trust in Him. The waves and wind still know His name.

2 Kings 4:26 Run now, I pray thee, to meet her, and say unto her, Is it well with thee? is it well with thy husband? is it well with the child? And she answered, It is well.

I love the story in 2 Kings 4. My summary of the story in 2 Kings 4 is this:

Elisha the prophet went through the town of Shunam quite a bit. A Shunammite woman always offered bread to Elisha when he would pass by. He came that way so much that her and her husband made him a bed at their house for him to stay when he came by that way. The man and woman found favor in Elisha’s eyes. Elisha told them she would have a son within the year and she did just like he said. When he was older, he fell ill and died. The Shunammite woman laid him on Elisha’s bed in their house and got on a donkey to go to Elisha. Her husband asked why she was going to see Elisha and she answered IT IS WELL. When she got close, Elisha saw her and sent his servant to get her. Elisha’s servant asked if everything was okay she replied IT IS WELL. Even thought her little son had died, she said it is well. She fell before Elisha’s feet. He knew something was wrong and she was “vexed in her soul”. She asked him did she not desire a son and to not deceive her. Elisha knew something was wrong with her son so he and the woman traveled back to her house, where he saw the boy was dead. He prayed to God & the child came back to life.

What gets me about this story, is that the Shunammite woman continually said IT IS WELL. Her circumstances were horrible. She lost the son that God had given her, but she refused to let that bring her down. I’ve said it before but attitude can make such a HUGE difference in your life.

I think sometimes in life we focus so much on the circumstances. We become blinded by all the bad things, unhappiness and the negativity that we forget that God can help us. We take on a poor attitude and outlook (I’m so guilty of this). The Shunammite woman was heartbroken! Her son that she never expected to have had died. Loosing a child would be devastating. She knew the only way she would get through and the only way to get help was to go to the man of God.

My soul has been weary and unsettled. I just feel burnt out and exhausted. I have had a bad attitude and have been in a bad overall mood for a long time. I was praying this morning, God please help me in my time of unhappiness and heartache I can’t take this anymore! The song It Is Well With My Soul came to mind. I LOVE when God speaks to me like that. I started singing it to myself. Then I looked it up on YouTube because I couldn’t remember the words. I am horrible with remembering words to songs! I listened to the Hymn version and saw a video It Is Well by Kristene DiMarco & Bethel Music. I listened to it and was just overwhelmed with peace. I loved the line “So let go my soul and trust in Him. The waves and wind still know His name.” It just spoke to me. No matter how the storms may rage in my life God still has power over them! The winds and oceans have to obey God. He is in control and I can say IT IS WELL!

I have a hard time of letting go sometimes. I try to take things on myself. I am strong-willed and independent. I hate for anyone to do something for me, I’d rather just do it myself. I struggle a lot with letting go and letting God handle my circumstances. In the past few years I’ve learned more and more how to do this. I just feel like I’m burdening God with things that are silly or don’t matter. God cares about me and he cares about what I am going through. He loves us. He loves us so much, he gave his ONLY son to die on a cross for OUR sins. We just have to get over ourselves and surrender to him. Even though circumstances haven’t changed, I know God can change them. If he doesn’t, he will get me through! I know God hears my prayers! There is peace in that alone. Through it all I am going to say IT IS WELL!!

Below is a link to the YouTube version of It Is Well by Kristene DiMarco & Bethel Music as well as a link to It Is Well (Elisha’s Song) by the Isaacs

God bless!

Iva Mae

It Is Well by Kristene DiMarco & Bethel Music

https://youtu.be/YNqo4Un2uZI

It Is Well (Elisha’s Song) by The Isaacs

https://youtu.be/w87KlbHCZJw

Part the Sea

This is from http://www.egypt-tours.org

We all know the story of Moses parting the Red Sea. The Children of Israel had just left Egypt and were no longer slaves. Pharaoh and his army were hot on their trail and pursuing them. The Children of Israel were afraid and started saying it was better when they were slaves. Moses told the Children of Israel (Exodus 14:13 & 14) “…Fear ye not, stand still, and see the salvation of the Lord, which he will shew to you to day: for the Egyptians whom ye have seen to day, ye shall see them again no more for ever. The Lord shall fight for you, and ye shall hold your peace.” God told Moses to that he would show Pharaoh and his army that He was Lord. God told Moses to raise his staff over the sea and it would part. The Children of Israel would walk on dry land. The angel and pillar that led the way for the Children of Israel, went behind them and cut the Egyptians off from them. Moses did what God told him to do and the Red Sea was parted and the Children of Israel crossed on dry land safely to the other side. The Egyptians went after them. God told Moses to stretch out his hand over the sea so the water would go back together and consume the Egyptians. Moses obeyed God and the Children of Israel were saved.

I got three important things from this. 1). God will make a way when there doesn’t seem to be one. He will part your Red Sea. 2). Be obedient to God and he will use you to do mighty things. 3). There is beauty when God parts your sea, even though it may seem scary.

We should never put limitations on God even when it is something major or that seems so impossible that it could never happen. Matthew 19:26 “…With God all things are possible.” Whatever your Red Sea is, when you come to it, be patient. Obey God and do what he tells you to. Moses listened to God and because of his obedience the Children of Israel were saved from the Egyptians. When God parts your sea, it might be scary! I’ve thought about what it would be like to walk in the middle of the sea. There’s a wall of water on each side of you as high as you can see. I’m sure you see every rock, piece of sea weed, coral, and what not on the sea floor and surrounding you are whales, fish and sharks. The water on both sides would be scary too. You may feel like it might come down on you. Keep the faith, trust God and be obedient!! Walk through that sea on dry land knowing God is protecting you and he will make a way. Enjoy your view through it all, find the beauty. I’m sure the Children of Israel saw some beautiful and marvelous things through their walk in the sea floor! I would love to see the different sea life that they saw. I looked up what kinds of sea life is in the Red Sea because I am curious like that and found a site that listed the different sea life in the Red Sea. The link is below.

http://www.aziab.com/red%20sea%20marine%20life.htm

This is my favorite fish I found that is in the Red Sea. It’s called a Masked Butterflyfish.

Here is a map of the Red Sea. I like to get the whole picture and see where things took place.

I got such comfort from reading Exodus14 today. Even when things seem hopeless, there is still hope! God takes care of his children!

I know this wasn’t extravagant or mind blowing, but I hope some one else was able to find comfort as I did! God Bless!

Love from above,

Iva Mae

P.S. Enjoy one of my favorite funnies! I had a calendar with this on it by DaySpring. This cracks me up!

Herman Catches A Lucky Break

His Eye is on The Sparrow

Matthew 10:29-31 Are not two sparrows sold for a farthing? and one of them shall not fall on the ground without your Father. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear ye not therefore, ye are of more value than many sparrows.

Often I feel like I don’t matter and that my problems don’t matter to God. That is NOT true at all. If it matters to me it matters to God. He cares about me and he cares about my problems and my circumstances. He says in His word that He knows when a sparrow falls and to FEAR NOT! We are of more value than sparrows. If God knows when a small little bird falls, He knows what we need when we need it. It matters to him. We are important to Him!! We can go to Him with our problems, cares and worries!

Matthew 11:28 Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.

God says in His word that he is a place of rest! He is also a refuge and a help when we are in trouble (Psalms 46:1). We can go to Him and be safe no matter what is bothering us. A refuge is shelter or protection from danger or trouble; a place that provides shelter or protection. Asking for help can be humbling. It is for me. I’m so independent and have been since birth. It’s a good habit that has it faults. Especially when it comes to asking for help when I need it. I still somehow think I can do it on my own.

1 Peter 5:6 & 7 Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time: Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.

God’s word tells us what to do. We just sometimes do not want bother Him. I feel that way often. I believe that what I feel or what I am going through isn’t worthy of God’s time, but that is wrong. God says so clearly in His word to cast all your cares on Him.

I woke up this morning with the song “Better than a Hallelujah” by Amy Grant on my mind. The words “We pour out our miseries God just hears a melody. Beautiful the mess we are the honest cries of breaking hearts are better than a hallelujah sometimes” just keep going through my mind over and over again this morning. I said God what are you trying to tell me. I started reading and all of the verses above just spoke to me. I don’t have to fear, I don’t have to worry or hurt. God can take that for me. He wants to or He wouldn’t have told us in His word to cast all your cares upon him for he cares for you.

It’s a learning process every day as a Christian. I’m learning something new and understanding something more than I did before. I know now not to worry about taking anything to God, big or small, he will help me.

God Bless!!

Love from above,

Iva Mae

What a Friend

The past few days have been so trying on me. Nothing really bad has happened but a lot of little things just building up. My mood has been sour and I’ve been hateful. I went to the grocery this morning and was upset that I went over budget. It may not seem much but the end of the month beginning of the month is tight. A lot of things come out and we don’t have much wiggle room. I was upset and worried. I turned on my Pandora station and started putting away groceries. The song What a Friend we have in Jesus came on and I started listening to the words and the first 2 lines just spoke to me. I started crying and  because how stupid I have been for not taking every little thing to God. Then I started praising God because I can take everything to him in prayer. I was so overwhelmed with love and the presence of God. As I started writing this 10-12 doves were on my garage roof and most ended up looking at me.  I couldn’t get a picture of all of them as when 2 would land 2-4 would fly off. It just made me so happy. I love to hear doves. God gives us signs if we look for them. I know this was my sign from God that everything will be okay.

Acts 6:4 “But we will give ourselves continually to prayer, and to the ministry of the word.”

This past week I’ve been lacking in my reading and praying. I’m thankful for the little things God gives us to remind us of His love and that he is here for us.

WHAT A FRIEND

What a friend we have in Jesus, All our sins and griefs to bear! What a privilege to carry everything to God in prayer.

O, what peace we often forfeit, O,what needless pain we bear, All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer.

Check out the song by clicking the link below

http://youtu.be/8WbCjEBclEY

God bless!

Love from above,

Iva Mae

Doubt

I hate doubting! When I doubt something it consumes me. I can’t get it off of my mind. It eats at me.

Sometimes our doubts are things that are good to doubt. For instance, doubting whether or not a stranger off the street will give a million dollars, that is something unlikely to happen. Other things, like if God can forgive us is not something you should doubt.

Satan is really good at bringing up past things that I’ve done and that I’ve already asked God for forgiveness for and that God has forgiven me for. Yesterday in my Pastor’s message, he mentioned that. He also said that God doesn’t remember them because he has already cast them as far as the east is to the west.

Psalms 103:11&12 “For as the heaven is high above the earth, so great is his mercy toward them that fear him. As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.”

Satan remembers our sins and we remember our sins. Satan loves to try to bring you down with things you’ve done in the past. He wants to do whatever he can to ruin you so you cannot be a vessel for God. He likes to poke at us a prod and mock us. He will bring up everything you’ve done. Sometimes out of the blue!! The other day, I randomly remembered when I was 2 and I walked by my Grandma’s room and saw $20 sticking out of her purse. I grabbed it and stuck it in my little cat purse. I really don’t think I knew it was wrong. I started dwelling on that. How ridiculous! Things like this and others Satan likes to throw in our minds so we get tripped up.

I did a study on doubt. What is it? What can it do? What does the bible say about this?

Doubt by definition is: to be uncertain about something: to believe that something may not be true or is unlikely; to have no confidence in someone of something; to lack confidence, to consider unlikely.

• A synonym is, to question.

When we doubt, we start questioning. It makes sense. I started questioning God did you ever forgive me? I remember getting saved so yes he did but sometime the question still remains.

The Casting Crowns song, “East to West” is a perfect example!

I really like the first verse.

Here I am, Lord, and I’m drowning in your sea of forgetfulness. The chains of yesterday surround me. I yearn for peace and rest. I don’t want to end up where you found me and it echoes in my mind, keeps me awake tonight. I know you’ve cast my sin as far as the east is from the west. And I stand before you now as though I’ve never sinned. But today I feel like I’m just one mistake away from you leaving me this way.

I know that I am not the only one to have ever felt this way.

I realized that maybe at the root of me wondering is doubt. I’m lacking faith and I’m letting Satan get the best of me.

Isiah 41:13 “For I the Lord thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not; I will help thee.”

Romans 8:39 “Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

God’s word says that he will hold our hand and help us. It also says that nothing can separate us from the love of God.

 2 Corinthians 12:9 “And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”

Jesus says His grace is sufficient for me!!! That is the answer. Yes he can forgive me and yes he has forgiven me of my past sins that I have already asked him forgiveness for!

I wrote this blog over a 2 day period. I am thankful that a friend on Facebook posted 2 Corinthians this morning. It spoke to my heart and overwhelmed me with God’s love. I love when God speaks to you through His word!! Thank God for people who have things put on their hearts to help others. You never know something you say or do may help someone else!!

Have you ever felt that way? What did you do to help you get over yourself?

Love from above,

Iva Mae

Stir the Pot

One of my favorite newer Disney movies is Ratatouille. It’s adorable. If you’ve not seen it, you should! Remy, a rat, loves cooking and creating recipes. Linguini is a famous chef’s son…and he CANNOT cook. I was thinking on things this past week and this movie came to mind. A specific scene in the movie actually. Linguini has just been hired at a restaurant and decides he is going to make the soup better by adding a bunch of ingredients to the pot. He tastes it and it is nasty. Remy comes along and fixes it, but Linguini ruined the original soup.

Click HERE for the video clip where Linguini ruins the soup

I’ve been thinking about the traps that Satan sets. He is sneaky, crafty and there isn’t anything he won’t do that he is able to make you trip you up. Like Linguini he comes along to your brain and adds a few thoughts and stirs the pot. If you don’t remove the thoughts and ask God to help you, it can end up being devastating. It doesn’t matter what Satan adds in. It could be things about yourself, that you don’t need God, that life isn’t worth living, that you should harm yourself, stealing, killing, fornication (sex outside of marriage) or anything that can consume your thoughts and ruin your mind.

The enemy is here to steal, kill & destroy.

John 10:10 “The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy:…”

When negative or bad thoughts come into your head, pray and ask God to help you. Ask him to remove the thoughts and to help you focus on Him.

Just imagine Satan pouring deceit from his spice rack in your brain and stirring the pot when deceitful thoughts come into your head.

Love from above,

Iva Mae