Doubt

I hate doubting! When I doubt something it consumes me. I can’t get it off of my mind. It eats at me.

Sometimes our doubts are things that are good to doubt. For instance, doubting whether or not a stranger off the street will give a million dollars, that is something unlikely to happen. Other things, like if God can forgive us is not something you should doubt.

Satan is really good at bringing up past things that I’ve done and that I’ve already asked God for forgiveness for and that God has forgiven me for. Yesterday in my Pastor’s message, he mentioned that. He also said that God doesn’t remember them because he has already cast them as far as the east is to the west.

Psalms 103:11&12 “For as the heaven is high above the earth, so great is his mercy toward them that fear him. As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.”

Satan remembers our sins and we remember our sins. Satan loves to try to bring you down with things you’ve done in the past. He wants to do whatever he can to ruin you so you cannot be a vessel for God. He likes to poke at us a prod and mock us. He will bring up everything you’ve done. Sometimes out of the blue!! The other day, I randomly remembered when I was 2 and I walked by my Grandma’s room and saw $20 sticking out of her purse. I grabbed it and stuck it in my little cat purse. I really don’t think I knew it was wrong. I started dwelling on that. How ridiculous! Things like this and others Satan likes to throw in our minds so we get tripped up.

I did a study on doubt. What is it? What can it do? What does the bible say about this?

Doubt by definition is: to be uncertain about something: to believe that something may not be true or is unlikely; to have no confidence in someone of something; to lack confidence, to consider unlikely.

• A synonym is, to question.

When we doubt, we start questioning. It makes sense. I started questioning God did you ever forgive me? I remember getting saved so yes he did but sometime the question still remains.

The Casting Crowns song, “East to West” is a perfect example!

I really like the first verse.

Here I am, Lord, and I’m drowning in your sea of forgetfulness. The chains of yesterday surround me. I yearn for peace and rest. I don’t want to end up where you found me and it echoes in my mind, keeps me awake tonight. I know you’ve cast my sin as far as the east is from the west. And I stand before you now as though I’ve never sinned. But today I feel like I’m just one mistake away from you leaving me this way.

I know that I am not the only one to have ever felt this way.

I realized that maybe at the root of me wondering is doubt. I’m lacking faith and I’m letting Satan get the best of me.

Isiah 41:13 “For I the Lord thy God will hold thy right hand, saying unto thee, Fear not; I will help thee.”

Romans 8:39 “Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

God’s word says that he will hold our hand and help us. It also says that nothing can separate us from the love of God.

 2 Corinthians 12:9 “And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”

Jesus says His grace is sufficient for me!!! That is the answer. Yes he can forgive me and yes he has forgiven me of my past sins that I have already asked him forgiveness for!

I wrote this blog over a 2 day period. I am thankful that a friend on Facebook posted 2 Corinthians this morning. It spoke to my heart and overwhelmed me with God’s love. I love when God speaks to you through His word!! Thank God for people who have things put on their hearts to help others. You never know something you say or do may help someone else!!

Have you ever felt that way? What did you do to help you get over yourself?

Love from above,

Iva Mae

Stir the Pot

One of my favorite newer Disney movies is Ratatouille. It’s adorable. If you’ve not seen it, you should! Remy, a rat, loves cooking and creating recipes. Linguini is a famous chef’s son…and he CANNOT cook. I was thinking on things this past week and this movie came to mind. A specific scene in the movie actually. Linguini has just been hired at a restaurant and decides he is going to make the soup better by adding a bunch of ingredients to the pot. He tastes it and it is nasty. Remy comes along and fixes it, but Linguini ruined the original soup.

Click HERE for the video clip where Linguini ruins the soup

I’ve been thinking about the traps that Satan sets. He is sneaky, crafty and there isn’t anything he won’t do that he is able to make you trip you up. Like Linguini he comes along to your brain and adds a few thoughts and stirs the pot. If you don’t remove the thoughts and ask God to help you, it can end up being devastating. It doesn’t matter what Satan adds in. It could be things about yourself, that you don’t need God, that life isn’t worth living, that you should harm yourself, stealing, killing, fornication (sex outside of marriage) or anything that can consume your thoughts and ruin your mind.

The enemy is here to steal, kill & destroy.

John 10:10 “The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy:…”

When negative or bad thoughts come into your head, pray and ask God to help you. Ask him to remove the thoughts and to help you focus on Him.

Just imagine Satan pouring deceit from his spice rack in your brain and stirring the pot when deceitful thoughts come into your head.

Love from above,

Iva Mae

God where are you?!

We’ve all wondered where God is sometimes. It seems like he isn’t anywhere. We know he is there but he feels so far away. The past several months I’ve felt dead inside. I knew God was there but I couldn’t feel him. I felt so lost, so broken and so afraid. I’ve been going through a spiritual battle. Literally there is a spiritual battle in my home. I have felt the presence of evil in my own home.

The other night my husband was gone and it was just me and my dog, Bandit. We were in the kitchen. I had just washed dishes and was getting ready to put some more things away. All of a sudden I got a horrible feeling and my dog took off running and ran and his on the couch. I went to him to see what was wrong and he was shaking. I sat with him for a moment and the feeling came back but this time it was stronger and I could literally feel a horrible evil in my home. My dog saw something and watched something walk across the living and the something stopped directly in front of us. I immediately got down on my knees and started praying. I asked God for protection of our home. I asked that if there was anything in our home that was not of God, that it be removed and be made known it was not welcome in Jesus name. I prayed and I honestly do not even know what else I prayed. Words flowed from my mouth and peace overcame me and my dog. As I knelt at the couch and prayed he laid down beside me and closed his eyes. After I was done praying a verse came to my mind. Matthew 19:26 “…With God all things are possible.”

 

I wrote it my fridge calendar and underlined ALL. I stood in my kitchen listening to a song and I lifted my hands, sang, praised and worshiped God. I felt his presence and was overwhelmed with joy all I could do was cry. I had peace in my heart for the fist time in a long time.

Believe it or not but it happened. I’ve been pressed down and felt like I was in chains of sadness and doubt. My heart was broken and I felt trampled. Things may not be perfect but they are getting better and I am thankful! The song Find You On My Knees by Kari Jobe came to mind.

 

Find You On My Knees – Kari Jobe

Troubles chasing me again, breaking down my best defense, I’m looking. God I’m looking for you.

Weary just won’t let me rest, fear is filling up my head, I’m longing. God I’m longing for you. But I will

Find you in this place I’m in, find you when I’m at my end. Find you when there’s nothing left of me to offer you except for brokenness. You lift me up, you never leave me thirsty.When I am weak, when I am lost and searching. I’ll find you on my knees.

So what if sorrow shakes my faith? What if heartache still remains? I’ll trust you. My God I’ll trust you. ‘Cause you are faithful. And I will find you in the place I’m in. Find you when there’s nothing left of me to offer you except for brokenness. You lift me up, you never leave me thirsty. When I am weak when I am lost and searching. Find you on my knees.

When my hope is gone, when the fear is strong, when the pain is real and it’s hard to feel. When my faith is shaken and my heart is broken and my joy is stolen God I know that you lift me up you never leave me searching.

Find you in this place I’m in, find you when I’m at my end. Find you when there’s nothing left of me to offer you except for brokenness. You lift me up, you never leave me thirsty.When I am weak, when I am lost and searching. I’ll find you on my knees. 

This song speaks to me. So what, IF sorrow shakes my faith? So WHAT, IF heartache still remains? I’ll TRUST YOU. MY GOD, I’LL TRUST YOU. I will trust God! He never leaves me thirsty or searching. Other things in life do but not God. He is my healer, my savior, my love, my life, my joy, my hope and my salvation! So even when everything is falling apart God is allowing that so he can pick up the pieces and put them back together better than my attempt. He makes the pieces fit even when think they cannot.

 

 

When My Heart is Overwhelemed

Psalm 61:2 “…When my heart is overwhelmed: lead me to the rock that is higher than I.”

I love when you’re going through something and a verse pops into your head. I’m beyond my breaking point in a certain situation. My husband and Mom have been reassuring me that everything will work out but I cannot see how.

I was thinking about how overwhelmed I’ve been and Psalm 61:2 popped into my head. I was sitting at my desk and started to cry. It was just like a breath of fresh air. I felt like God was reminding me to give my burdens to him because he can handle them. I know that no matter the outcome whether the situation is resolved or not, God will help me through it. If the situation isn’t changed he will give me the strength to get through each and every day.

I have to believe that change is ahead for me and that a new door of opportunity will be opened and the doors that need to be closed will be closed.

Job 36:15 “He delivereth the poor in his affliction, and openeth their ears in oppression.”

While I’m waiting for God to move I need to keep my ears and heart open to listen to what God has to say. Sometimes we busy ourselves so much we don’t take time to listen to what God is saying. We miss Him reaching out to us because we are so caught up in our lives.

Maybe all this time I’ve missed the little reminders that God is with me and that he is working on it because I’ve been too caught up in my situation.

Psalm 62:5 “My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him.”

Sometimes God doesn’t change our situations because he’s trying to change our hearts. That sometimes is the hardest words to swallow. They are bitter and hard to chew.

I think I’m going to have another serving of humble pie! If you think of me pray for me that God will move and change my situation or change my heart about it.

Wishing you many blessings!

Love from above,

Iva Mae

Let it Go!

Proverbs 15:13 A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance: but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken.

 

Have you ever felt just broken? You may have even felt like there is no hope. I have been there. I have had a heaviness on my heart before that weighed me down like an anchor cast off of a freight liner in the ocean. I have felt like I was sinking and drowning and no one could help me.

Even once I got saved I have felt that way. I think it is safe to say that we all have felt that way at some point in our lives. It seems like nothing anyone says or does makes that feeling go away.

Psalms 119:28 My soul melteth for heaviness; strengthen thou me according unto thy word.

Sometimes we let people & what they do, circumstances and situations control us. We let those things control our happiness and our lives. Jesus can bear all of weights and burdens and pains. He broke the chains and sometimes we still let those chains keep us down. We are like animals who when caged won’t come out of the cage once it is opened so they can be freed. We are fearful. We are forgetful and we want to carry our burdens we don’t want to give them away.

Isaiah 9:4 For thou hast broken the yoke of his burden, and the staff of his shoulder, the rod of his oppressor, as in the day of Midian.

I am trying to give some things to God and it’s hard. I don’t know why I think I need them or that I can handle them better but sometimes I just can’t let go. I am going to work on it. If you are struggling with it, I encourage you to ask God to help you let go and give it to him. Know I will be praying for anyone who reads this. So Let it go!

P.S. Although I’ve not had the pleasure of seeing Frozen I realized my title is a song from the movie. I asked my husband for the movie for my birthday in a few weeks. I CANNOT wait to watch it!!!!!

God,

I ask you to please help those of us who have a hard time letting go of things that are holding us down. I ask you to give us peace. We struggle with giving things to you even though we know you can handle them better than we can. I ask you to guide us and direct us. For those who have heartaches and are broken I ask that you would please pick up the pieces and give them comfort. help those who feel like they are drowning in their problems. I love you and I thank you for all you’ve done and all you will do. I know in your hands I’m safest.

Amen

 

Check Yourself Before You Wreck Yourself

Check yourself before you Wreck yourself……….

I had someone say that to me during one of my low points in life. It made me mad. She was right I needed to check myself because I was wrecking myself and others. I was spewing horrible words of hatred from my mouth. I didn’t care who I hurt because I was hurt. My attitude was poor and I did and said a lot of things I still regret to this day.

Anger and sadness can ruin you if you let them.

When you are angry and you forgive someone, you do it because that’s what God says (Matthew 18:21-22) and holding grudges only hurts yourself. It will make you have a bad attitude and you will harm others as well as yourself.

Sadness can cause depression and a bad attitude. You can be hurt, sad and mad at the same time. It can cause you to have a negative attitude towards life and others. There is a time to mourn and a time to laugh (Ecclesiastes 3:4). You cannot let sorrow and sadness rule your life.

What is an attitude?

According the Merriam-Webster.com, attitude is – the way you think & feel about someone or something; a feeling or way of thinking that affects a person’s behavior.

I’ve met several people and know people who have bad attitudes. It can make even the prettiest woman ugly. It makes you not want to be around them. As Christians we are to be Christ like. Even through suffering, loss, anger and a massive amount of followers He never had a bad/negative/poor attitude.

The past few weeks I have had a bad attitude. I am grumpy and irritable. I have had a “Negative Nancy” outlook on everything. I could barely stand myself. I fell last week on the stairs and injured my foot. I was extremely mad and angry. I hate being laid up and not able to get up and go. I was in extreme pain last week and instead of dealing with it the healthy way I dealt with it the grumpy way. I started thinking about my attitude and how I was representing Christ. It made me feel ashamed. I realized that no matter what you go through or what comes your way you can decide how you are going to feel about it and react to it.

There’s a famous quote that says

“…Life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you … We are in charge of our Attitudes.” Charles Swindoll

God’s word says:

Ephesians 4:1-3 “I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, beseech you that ye walk worthy of the vocation wherewith ye are called. With all lowliness and meekness, with longsuffering, forbearing one another in love; Endeavoring to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.”

1 Corinthians 15:33 “Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners.”

Phillippians 2:14-15 “Do all things without murmurings and disputings: That ye may be blameless and harmless, the sons of God, without rebuke, in the midst of a crooked and perverse nation, among whom ye shine as lights in the world;”

Proverbs 17:22 “A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones.”

1 Corinthians 16:14 “Let all your things be done with love.”

 

The next time something bad happens and you know you can’t change the situation, change your attitude.

 

You can’t always have what you want

Matthew 7:7-11 “Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened. Or what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone? Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent? If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?”

 

We don’t always get what we want but God gives us what we need. I haven’t posted anything in a while now. The reason is because I was doing two jobs at once, my current one and assisting in another. There was talk that I would move into this other job. I had been praying for some time that God would open a door for me to be able to have another position or job that would be easier when I have kids. I was excited that God had finally answered my prayer.

 

After some time it was decided that I didn’t have the experience necessary for the job and I agreed. Christmas eve I went back to my old job full time. I was a little disappointed in myself that I didn’t have the skills for the job. I had prayed that God’s will be done. I told God I wanted the job, but I wanted what he wanted for me more. I truly believe that God knows what is best in our lives. God has showed me he is in charge of my life in more ways than one. It gets better.

 

Kyle and I have been looking for houses. We have lived with my parents for 3 years going into the 4^th year. Circumstances have kept us there and we are more than ready to be on our own. We love them but we’ve not really gotten to start our lives together yet and it’s getting old. We found a house that we both loved and wanted to make an offer on it. The day we made the decision I called our realtor and left her message explaining our decision. She called back that night and said that someone else had put an offer on it and it looked like it was going to go through so the house was no longer available. That day Kyle and I both said the same  prayer without knowing it that if God doesn’t want us to buy that house to make it to where we couldn’t. He did exactly that.

 

We are still looking for houses and we are still praying the same prayer. We know God has the perfect place for us, we just have to wait for his timing. You never know where that may be. We have to ask God to point us in the right direction. Let him lead us. Psalms 3:6 “In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.”

 

If you are waiting for God to answer a prayer or you’ve been given an answer you didn’t want, hang in there. God knows what he is doing. He gives us what we need when we need it! I truly believe it.

 

I love the above statements! I think they are so true! Keep trusting in Him!

Beauty From Ashes

 

How can something beautiful and wonderful come from something so ugly, dark, sticks to everything, leaves behind so much dust, goes where the wind blows and what seems nothing? How can you get beauty from ashes?

 

Sometimes things seem so terrible. Our lives can get burnt to the ground in an instant. We suffer death, sickness, pain, divorces, losing a job and many other discouraging things in our lifetimes. Sometimes the pain is bad we feel there is nothing left. Our lives become ugly & dark. The pain covers every other aspect of our lives and clouds our view. It goes with us wherever we go. We try to wipe it away and forget it. Like ashes, sometimes no matter how hard you try to get rid of the pain, some still remains.

 

We have a wood stove to heat our house. All my life I’ve seen my Dad put wood in the stove. I would watch it burn, feel the warmth and sometimes watch it go out. Once it would go out, my dad would clean out the ashes. The remains of what used to be wood, burned by fire. Most of the time, Dad would spill the ashes all over the bricks and the mat in front of the stove. I would try to clean up the ashes with a broom and dust pan. No matter how much I swept some would always remain there. I would even use a Swiffer. Even several swiffer’s and the vacuum could never get up all the ashes. If he opened the door to go outside before I got the ashes cleaned up, the ashes would go everywhere from the wind that would blow in the door. It would be a mess!!!

 

When my Dad took the ashes outside, he poured them on our garden. The ashes helped to make the soil rich and be full of nutrients.

 

Our lives are like this. Sometimes the most terrible things happen to us. Our lives may seem like they are burning to the ground. We don’t understand the pain, suffering or ugliness of life. Life isn’t fair, but we have a God who can take the ugliness, pain and suffering and make is beautiful!

 

My husband has been having terrible headaches for years now. They have recently gotten worse. I know God can heal him but I also know if God chooses not to heal him, he will get the glory in it and it will be beautiful.

 

When I had cancer, life seemed so bleak at first. After the initial shock, I decided that I was going to let God heal me and if he didn’t use me to help others. It turned out he allowed me to go through it so I could grow, become stronger and help others. I got my healing in more ways than one. I’ve never been so thankful for my legs or for the ability to walk. I love to walk!! I love to be active. God gave me a blessing by allowing the tumor in my leg to be benign and allowing me to keep my leg.

 

You may be going through something difficult and it seems like there is no end. Just remember to hold on. God is going to use this hardship to help you grow. We all need more nutrients sometimes so we can become richer and the seeds we plant of Christianity will grow and flourish.

 

I got today’s post after my cousin Emily told me to read Isaiah 61:1-3

 

Isaiah 61:1-3 “The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me; because the Lord hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound; To proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all that mourn; To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified.

http://youtu.be/M-GPbYcTDbQ   

Beauty From Pain by SuperChick Click on the link above

 

Fruit of Hate?! What a sour bite!

This past week I’ve been struggling with hatred in my heart against someone. I’ve tried to get rid of it but it really hard. This person isn’t a good person or even a decent person. The world would say I have reason and would justify my hatred. Jesus says love your neighbor as yourself. It is hard sometimes to have love for people who have hurt you and people you love. Sometime people are out of your life and then come back like a bad penny. This is what made my hate resurface.

 

It is easier to hate than love. That doesn’t make it right though. The person is someone who lives in sin and influences others to go down their path of self destruction. It’s hard to have compassion for people who act in such ways. As a Christian I can’t feel that their behavior is acceptable. Hate the sin not the sinner. I ended up praying that God would make a way for this person to not be involved in our lives anymore. I prayed that no harm would be done to this person. I just don’t want their influence or power over others around my family.

 

My devotion this morning about the fruit of the spirit (Galatians 5:22-25) gently reminded me that I need to cut my fruit of hatred off of my tree. It was making my branches weighed down. Sometimes you have to prune your branches so you can grow and get rid of all the dead things that weigh you down. It is not comfortable but it is necessary in order to grow. You will know a tree by its fruit. What does your fruit say about your tree? Do you need to get out the trimmers or maybe the chain saw (that’s what I need) to get rid of your dead limbs and bad fruit? I challenge you to examine yourself and get rid of the bad and work on producing more of the good. I am working on it! We all need a good pruning sometimes!

 

The fruit of the spirit are love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness and temperance. What are these qualities that we are supposed to have?

Love – unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another

Joy– : a feeling of great happiness; a source or cause of great happiness ; something or someone that gives joy to someone; a state of happiness or felicity; bliss ; a source or cause of delight

Peace – a state of tranquility or quiet: as; freedom from disquieting or oppressive thoughts or emotions; harmony in personal relations

 Longsuffering – suffering for a long time without complaining; very patient during difficult times; patiently enduring lasting offense or hardship

 Gentleness – the quality or state of being gentle; especially mildness of manners or disposition

                         Gentle – having or showing a kind and quiet nature: not harsh or violent; not hard or forceful; not strong or harsh in effect or quality; free from harshness, sternness, or violence

Goodness – the quality or state of being good

                        Good – virtuous, right, commendable, kind, benevolent

Faith – : strong belief or trust in someone or something; belief in the existence of God; strong religious feelings or beliefs; firm belief in something for which there is no proof; complete trust

Meekness – having or showing a quiet and gentle nature; not wanting to fight or argue with other people; submissive

Temperance – the practice of always controlling your actions, thoughts, or feelings so that you do not eat or drink too much, become too angry, etc.

 

 What fruit is on your tree? Which fruit of the spirit do you need to work on?

 

Waiting

Today I had a dream that got crushed into a million pieces. I’ve been praying and praying that God would make a way for Kyle and I to move out soon if it was his will. We both struggle with feeling like losers because things happened the way they did and we weren’t able to get a place of our own when we first got married. Things still haven’t moved in that direction and its been 3 years. After finding out that we still aren’t able to get own our own right now, I had a mini break down. I thought about all the recently married couples in our life and how they all have houses or are in the process. It makes me feel worse about our situation. It’s embarrassing and people judge us and think badly of us because we live with my parents. We are blessed and fortunate that they allow us to live where we do. We pay our own bills and buy our own groceries. Despite all of that I still feel like a failure and I don’t feel like an adult.

I went for a run to get out my anger and it helped me a to calm down. I whined to my Mom about it and she reminded me about how I’ve been praying for God’s will to be done. She was right. I have been praying for God’s will to be done. It’s hard to wait sometimes! Especially when you want something so bad. God knows what he is doing and what is in our best interest. I have to keep on holding onto God’s promises and knowing that he knows best and sometimes you have to just wait.

Psalms 62:1 Truly my soul waiteth upon God: from him cometh my salvation.

Psalms 62:5 My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him.

Like the verse says my expectation is from him so my soul will wait only upon God. No matter how hard it gets we have to be patient and wait on Gods timing for all things we have asked him for .

I don’t know if anyone else is going through anything similar but I hope these verses help you and give you comfort the way they did me.