I thought for sure by now that God would have answered my prayers. I don’t even know where to begin with where life has taken me these past few months. I’ve been desperately wanting something. Praying for something and it hasn’t happened.
I was reading my daily devotion today and it was like my eyes were opened it and I felt a peace. I’m reading Elisha: A Tale of Ridiculous Faith in my Bible Ap. I love it! I get something out of every day’s devotion. Today’s was on a miracle of Elisha. 2 miracles happened in this section of scripture I was reading (2 Kings 4:3-37). 1. Elisha told the Shunammite woman she would have a baby 2. Elisha brought the child back to life when he had died.
I’ve read this story many times. I failed to notice that it took Elisha 2x to bring the child back to life. I’ve never noticed that before. The devotional content talked about the fact that it didn’t happen the first time Elisha tried to bring the child back to life. It asked, how many times have we been in Elisha’s position? We’ve prayed and asked God for something knowing that he would do it, but it hasn’t happened yet. It may not happen for months or years. Don’t give up or lose heart! Just because you aren’t successful the first time doesn’t mean that God will not answer your prayer! God knows best and he knows what the best timing would be for what you have asked for.
I have wanted a baby for a long time. When people would ask me when my husband and I were going to have kids, I’d just give the answer that my dog was my baby and he was the only baby I needed. In my heart I was angry that someone would ask. I felt like they were saying I wasn’t whole without a baby but truth was that, that was how I felt. I felt like I wasn’t whole. It has taken me some time to realize that even if I never have a baby, God makes me whole. It is God who completes me.
A few weeks ago I went to the alter because God was dealing with me about me being angry. I was angry for several reasons. 1. I wanted a baby. 2. I was pregnant but not long after I knew I was I lost it. I didn’t understand why God would take something from me that I wanted so badly. All of my cousins had babies. Most of my friends had them as well and I couldn’t understand why they could but I couldn’t.
I told my Daddy at the alter why I wanted to pray. He said baby, remember Hannah. He anointed me and asked God to give me the desires of my heart. It still has happened yet, but I am not giving up! I haven’t shared this with anyone but my close friends and my immediate family. I hate sharing my feelings because I hate when people feel sorry for you. I hate that! Don’t judge me, it is just the way that I am. I felt compelled to share this because I have read 3 different things about waiting for something that you have asked God for. I think a lot people are in similar situations. They may not be in the exact same situation but are in a waiting period in their lives.
If you are in a waiting period, do not give up. Don’t be angry at God. Realize that He knows what is best for us and in Hid timing our prayers will be answered. For now cling onto that hope from Psalms 37:4. Delight thyself also in the Lord; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.
This is the verse I am praying and clinging to.
May God Bless you!
Love from above,
Iva Mae
LIES FROM THE MIRROR 
The Father always gives us our hearts desire but the time needs to be right. It is always hard waiting because we don’t know what to do. People can ask questions that make us feel as if things are our fault. Bless You.
Thank you so much!
Thank you for writing this. This is your testimony and you have no idea how many people you will reach because of this. I have been there and I still feel the ache in my heart of losing my baby. I understand being angry for all of those reasons. I was in the midst of losing my child and someone asked me “when are you going to have kids?” People don’t understand how much that question hurts. I know people are sincerely curious, but regardless, it’s painful. I love you and you are not alone in this. 💋
Thank you Katie! That means a lot. I love you too. Thank you for your courage of sharing your story as well. I reread it after everything happened and it helped me so much! You are amazing.
I know losing a baby is so hard. When we lost our baby I cried until I just couldn’t cry anymore. I went through the stages of grief: I asked the doctor “are you sure the baby is dead? Are you sure there is only one baby?” I had a really hard time thinking God would take MY baby because I was a Christian, I did not do drugs, drink etc etc etc. I was so hurt and angry.
BUT if I had not lost that baby I would never have had Jimmy. I know Jimmy is a turd but I could not imagine my life without him.
I think sometimes there may have been something wrong with the baby and maybe God spared me the heartache of a long fatal illness of my child??
After the heartache of such a great loss God did bless me with another baby.
Please don’t give up. I know God will bless you with a child. I believe that with all my heart.
I love you Iva Mae!
Thank you Aunt Mary! I love you too! I didn’t realize that you had lost a baby as well. Jimmy is a pretty cool fellar. I believe you are right when you say that God knows and there may have been something wrong with the baby. Thank you for your faith! I believe that God will bless us with a baby in His time. I just have to be patient and wait!
As I’ve read your recent Facebook posts about ting I thought it was about this. As you know I know first hand what you are going through. Im going through again right now. Been actively trying since October 2014. It’s so hard and my heart goes out to you. I know that ache. After trying for 2.5 years, and a very early miscarriage, we got our miracle. I feel guilty every day that I get upset that we aren’t pregnant again because I don’t want him to think he’s not enough. But all the people asking if we will be having any more. It hurts. If you want to talk and vent we should get together. I would tell you it gets easier but it didn’t for me. That hole and that empty womb never got better. And the loss, that took me a while.
Lots of hugs girl. And my phone is always on.
Thank you Jes! I miss you tons and we should definitely get together soon!