Greatest Blessing

The past several months have been a whirlwind. I have felt absolute heartbreak and absolute joy. On Easter this past year I found out I was pregnant. I wish I could say that I jumped for joy. I did’t. I had the opposite reaction. I was actually deeply saddened by the news. I couldn’t bare going through another loss. I became angry. I didn’t understand why God would let me get pregnant just to have to say goodbye again.

October 2018 I went through my second pregnancy loss. It had been 3 years since we had gotten pregnant so I was ecstatic. I took the test and impatiently waited. When I saw the plus sign, I balled like a baby with joy. I wrapped the test up along with two onesies and gave them to my husband as a belated birthday present. At first he didn’t understand but when he got it, he was so happy. We told our parents and his brother over a special dinner.

We never thought that a few weeks later we would be in a hospital ER room getting the news that the baby didn’t make it. Hearing the words “I’m sorry but unfortunately the fetus isn’t viable” is gut wrenching. I couldn’t even cry. I was so upset, but deep down I knew that this was going to be the end result. I waited until I got home to cry. The next day I lost the baby.

I soon went into a deep depression. My husband and I were so devastated. I couldn’t help but feel I was to blame. We had waited 5 years for this and now it was gone in an instant. I felt like God abandoned me. I couldn’t feel his love and I felt alone. I also felt like a failure. I made stupid financial decisions. Sometimes grieving people do things that don’t make sense. They make hasty decisions. I invested in something without consulting my husband. Decisions like that should be made together, but I made it on my own and now we both have to pay for my bad choice. That’s another lesson for another day!

I took a class in January called Freedom. It set me free. It allowed me to see just how deep God’s love is. It also helped me to see that I didn’t need a baby to complete me. God completes us. During the class I found out I was pregnant. At the end of the class, we had a conference. I had several pray over me. I told them that I was worried of loosing the baby. At the time I thought I was going through the beginning of a pregnancy loss. It was brutal. The conference brought so much healing for me. God definitely did a working in me.

Now, I am trusting in the Lord to keep this sweet babe safe. I’ve been praying over it every day. There are some really good plans for expecting Moms on the Bible App. Yesterday on the way home, I prayed for the baby’s spouse that God would create someone that had the same faith and the same calling. I’ve prayed that even now my child would know who the Lord is and that it would make a decision for Christ at an early age. I pray that it will always choose to do right even when everyone else is doing wrong. I pray that it will stand strong on the word of God and speak the truth.

I am 4 months along. Every day, I wake up and look at my bump and feel overwhelmingly blessed. I just can’t believe that we have a baby. It’s real and not a dream. I am so happy that words cannot even tell you how I feel. Every moment brings bliss. I don’t even mind that I get heartburn a lot or that I get sick every time I smell certain things. It means that I have life growing inside me. God chose my husband and I to be this baby’s parents. We are truly blessed. I feel so humbled by everything.

Last week we got to see it move during an ultra sound. It was the best day of my life. My husband Kyle said yes it is the best day until we hold it in our arms. He’s right! If you are in the Dayton, OH area you should check out Baby & Co. 4D in Troy. They are amazing! The tech was so sweet and stayed with us until we found out what we were having. It’s a surprise until Saturday. So don’t ask!!

Throughout our story I have been reminded of Hannah. Hannah wanted a child so badly. She earnestly prayed and God granted her a son. She dedicated her baby to the Lord.

I Samuel 1:19-30 Then they rose early in the morning and worshiped before the Lord, and returned and came to their house at Ramah. And Elkanah knew Hannah his wife, and the Lord remembered her. So it came to pass in the process of time that Hannah conceived and bore a son, and called his name Samuel, saying,“Because I have asked for him from the Lord.”

Thank you to everyone who prayed for us. It’s amazing to have people go to the Lord on your behalf.

Stay tuned for the Gender Reveal! Check out the Facebook page on Saturday for the big reveal!! https://www.facebook.com/LiesFromTheMirror

Love from above,

Iva Mae

We are at WAR

image from thegospelcoalition.org

1, 2, 3, 4. I declare a thumb war! If only the wars that rage in us were as simple as the childhood game of thumb war.

I’ve been taking a class at a local church these past eleven weeks. Next week is the last class. It is hard to believe that it is almost over. This class has taught me so many things and given me clarity in my spiritual vision. It was helpful to start in Genesis and move forward. I’ve enjoyed this class so much and cannot wait until the conference in two weeks.

We were warned that in taking this class, especially part two, would bring spiritual attacks and warfare upon us. We discussed how many Christians do not even know that there is spiritual warfare or how to combat. A soldier cannot help win a war if he/she did not know they were in a war or how to use a weapon to fight!

How do we know that there is spiritual warfare?
2 Corinthians 10: 3-4 says, For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh: (For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;)

We do not war against flesh. What do we war against? Ephesians 6:12 says, For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

If we are unaware of the spiritual warfare in our own lives, and we don’t know the Word of God, how can we win? We cannot. I hate to admit it, but I honestly didn’t recognize some of the traps that the enemy set up for me. I like to think of it as walking through a forest and falling into a hole that has been covered by leaves or sticks. Before you know what is going on you’re caught in a trap.

How do we know where to look for traps? We know that Satan roams like a lion seeking whom he will devour. 1 Peter 5:8 This verse tells us that the enemy wants to destroy us.

The traps or snares from Satan are not always obvious. For me the trap begins with a thought. It usually catches me off guard. It is usually a lie that seems like a fact. For instance, a thought that creeps into my brain all the time is so form of “I am not good enough”. It could be something like, “You can’t do that because no one likes you enough” or “You are too fat” or You aren’t pretty enough”. You hear yourself say them enough and you start to believe them as truths.

You stop doing the things that God has called you to do because you don’t feel you are qualified or good enough to do them. The next thing you know you are depressed. You then own that depression and you get stuck in it. Then you do things and say things you would not normally do. We forget who we are. As born again Christians, we are children of the one true King. We are of a Royal Priesthood! We have been bought with a price. Jesus blood makes us worthy.

I recently heard about the 12 Audacious Faith Confessions by Pastor Steven Furtick at my Mary Kay Career Conference. The speaker, Julia Burnett talked about writing them all down and posting them over her house. When the enemy came at her with a lie she spoke one of those. She said it was like playing whack a mole. Satan would throw something at her and she’d hit it, then something else and she’d that. Whatever popped up she hit with the Word of God.

I left there feeling so refreshed and renewed in the Lord. She was so anointed and her words wrecked me. It was all I could do to cry. She said that when we think of ourselves so lowly we are a form of a narcissist. We aren’t thinking of ourselves more highly all the time, but we are thinking of ourselves all the time more lowly. We aren’t seeing ourselves the way God sees us. Pslams 139:14 says I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

We fight against the enemy in a spiritual battle with the Word. With God’s truths. The next time a thought creeps up in your mind, ask yourself is this really true? You don’t have to believe everything you think. If you wouldn’t talk to someone else the way you’re talking to yourself, STOP! Speak God’s truths. Write it on post it notes and put them all over your house. Write I am enough – I am fearfully and wonderfully made on your bathroom mirror. Say it to yourself out loud every day.

I heard someone say that they wanted to do a body building championship. She worked very hard on her body. Every day she would tell herself I am the 50+ Women’s Body Building Champion. She wrote it in her journal. She spoke it out loud, EVERY DAY. She said she won the competition. Her daughter asked her why she wasn’t more excited about. She said because I had already became the champion months ago. That is powerful!! Our words are powerful. Be careful what you say to yourself because you are listening!

Dear God I ask right now that you would give us a boldness to speak powerful and true words over our lives. I ask that you would please help us to see the attacks of the enemy and give us your Word to fight with. I ask that you would allow those who are held in bondage by the enemies lies to see that they can be made free with your truths. Help us to see where we need repentance and see your mercy, grace and love in our lives. Thank you for your love and sending your son to die so that we may be free. In Jesus name, Amen.

Have a wonderful Easter everyone!

Love from above,

Iva Mae